4:20am alarm goes off again. Up and Adam, gotta get ready to take J to the airport.
5:10am Bags loaded and I am in the drivers seat and off we go.
5:30am We arrive, check in and sit and wait/chat
5:50am I hug J good bye at security and head for the door, but first take a look over my shoulder to see him in line.
|A park in St. Louis where we met|
5:52am In my car on the way to the park to type and email to a friend (that I never sent, sigh)
7:00 am Home to find my 13 year old up and playing video games
|This is really my baby|
7:15am Whisper sweetly into my 7 yr olds ear, "You wanna get up and go for a bike ride in the park."
Eyes closed, sweet smile, slow nod saying yes, I leave he room.
7:30am Still no site of 7 yr old. Start to research "how to buy a bike" thank you YouTube!
8:15am Research completed, bike located and priced, extremely anxious to get the day started.
8:30am Talked 13yr in to accompanying me to return/ purchase new bike
*****Almost 10 am by the time we returned home and figured lunch would be good since I was determined to do an outdoor activity with the boys. We ate BLT's with avocado and Cheetos. Lunch eaten so out the door we went. Yes! The breeze was blowing, both boys were happy to be out and on their bikes and I was in mommy heaven. We returned home a little after 1:30. I instructed the boys to take showers and that they could have their game time and I headed back to the park.****
I found a secluded place in the park where I could hear the water lap the shore, the breeze was just right, and the shade just enough and I began to read. I have been reading the
The Power of a Praying Wife by Stormie Omartian, when I have time. I was on chapter 13 HIS TRIALS and didn't stop reading until I got to chapter 17. As I recharged my batteries, connected to God, and read this book about the why's and how's to pray for my husband I felt more and more affirmed regarding our lifestyle choice. It's not a DD book, but it does make being submissive sacred, holy and without worry of being a doormat or losing ones self.
The more I read the more proud of my husband I was for the faith that he carries so gracefully. I was also grateful to be reminded how to pray for him. Today I read quotes like, "If you want your husband to love you more, you need to love him more. It always works, especially if you're praying about it as well." & "If your schedule doesn't allow time to be with God and draw on His strength, then rework your priorities and make a new schedule. The old one is not working." (ch 16 p 128)
I know these quotes may not strike a cord with you, but for me they instantly brought me back into focus. As I read I had stray thoughts about my children and my friends and then about what I was and wasn't doing to be a good partner. And without feeling bad or beating myself up I felt directed and energized. I try hard to parent from the positive, but often forget how to love my self into action from the positive a lot of time.
|A butterfly we we're blessed and amazed to find attached to our hand rail. Of all places!|
With my batteries recharged I took a deep breath, enjoyed the last look at the sparkling rippling water and headed back to the asphalt that lead to my car. At home I found happy clean kids, until of course I mentioned to my youngest that it was time to read his three books, but that's okay because I am Mom and I do it out of love and devotion.
I don't want to lead anyone to believe that I don't miss J, I do! At the same time I am the type of person who needs to recharge by herself and this trip of his gave me that. On my way home from the park all I wanted to do was send him an email of all the warm feelings I had for him and to tell him, "Okay, I miss you. Please come home now!" I look forward to his return on Tuesday.
12:30 am Rambling completed. Whew! it has been a day.